Sunday, May 15, 2005

Well, I Never! Have You?

The Indigent Blogger piggybacked on an Ann Althouse post, which listed ten things she has never done. He began by crossing off the things he had done from her list, carried over the remainder to a new list of his own and added enough never-dones to total ten.

True to form, the Indigent Blogger’s list is as uncompromisingly honest and creative as are his blog posts, which you can and should find at Vagabondia. According to my site meter, I have two regular readers, excluding the Indigent Blogger. So, in the same forthright spirit, I challenge both of you to continue this thread and pass it on. Please note that I will skip the items on their lists that I have done, incorporate our common never-dones and add as many originals as space allows.

Ten Things Ann Althouse Has Never Done

1. Gone camping.

2. Eaten egg salad, devilled eggs, or cold hard-boiled eggs.

3. Gone skiing.

4. Set foot on any continent other than North America and Europe.

5. Shoplifted.

6. Watched a pornographic movie -- other than in federal court, as part of a forfeiture proceeding.

7. Called anyone "sir" or "ma'am."

8. Used a computer that wasn't a Macintosh (unless you count things like dedicated LEXIS consoles and ATM machines as computers).

9. Seen the movie "Apocalypse, Now." (It was always "Apocalypse," later, for me, and now maybe it's "Apocalypse," never. )

10. Used cocaine or heroin.

Ten Things the Indigent Blogger Has Never Done

1. Stepped foot on any continent other than North America.

2. Owned a new car.

3. Made a mortgage payment.

4. Had sex in a car.

5. Gone jogging (where I wasn't forced as part of a P.E. class).

6. Achieved a High School Diploma or GED.

7. Been to a professional basketball game.

8. Read the Chronicles of Narnia.

9. Visited the Grand Canyon (I've seen it from an airplane).

10. Had a professional massage.

Ten Things I Have Never Done

1. Gone skiing.

2. Set foot on any continent other than North America.

3. Used any illegal drugs, including cocaine and heroin.

4. Gone jogging (where I wasn't forced as part of a P.E. class).

5. Been to a professional basketball or football game.

6. Visited the Grand Canyon or any other National Park.

7. Had a professional massage, manicure or pedicure.

8. Put makeup on.

9. Gotten drunk.

10. Smoked any legal or illegal substances.

Item 8 was a source of concern to me before I went through chemotherapy two years ago. Losing my hair, which was waist-length for most of my adult life, turned out to be no big deal. But, as someone who never applied makeup and cannot draw a straight line with a ruler as my guide, the prospect of penciling in my eyebrows every day for more than six months was worrisome. Happily, although my brows got pretty thin, they did not disappear completely and my vain fears were in vain.

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